Finals SUCK

I got lucky in Wyoming to only have one final...ever, in two years. So I never have truly had the experience of finals week or heck week as some call it. Well I got it full blown this year...pay back for the years I had off I guess. Four tests in 3 days...kill me now. I am down to one test left, but I am suffering the consequences. I've had a headache for going on 5 days now, my eyes hurt from reading so much, and I find myself staring at words and not having a clue what they mean. One more day...

I can't wait to get to be home with my family and have a break for a little bit. Then real life has to come back of course, but I'll try to forget that as long as possible. I can't wait for friends who have been gone far too long to be back with me and enjoy these cold nights catching up and having lots of adventures!

Can't wait to see this beautiful girl again! Miss you Kort!

I get to share a room with my littlest brother now and he is absolutely a wonderful roommate! Monday night he talked himself to sleep talking to me. I love being home to help him with his homework and hear about how his day went. His laughter is contagious and I need a little bit of his happy in my life right now.

How can you not love that face? :)

Many things are ending, but so many are just beginning...bring on the next chapter! Also an update on Landon, he has now been gone for almost 14 months. He is doing great and loves the mission. We're on the downhill and this downhill better be a steep one...I can't wait to take it at full speed :)

My Big Little Brother

I think just about everyone believes their family is the best in world...I'm definitely one of them. I know I've written about this before, but this time I want to dedicate one to my brother. I can't call him my little brother anymore because he's got almost 6 inches on me, but he will always be my little brother. This boy has been one of my best friends since the day he was born. All growing up he was always so patient to be my student, my patient, and even sometimes my human mannequin. I remember making him mad and being scared to death that he was going to kill me so I would hurry and do something dumb to make him laugh. He had the cutest little blonde curls and the biggest ears. I loved that little boy and still do!

That boy is not so little anymore. He just turned 17 and is a junior in high school. He's 6'3" and could beat me up if he really wanted to. On Tuesday I came home to go to his game and as the time for the JV game to start got closer I kept wondering why we hadn't left yet. So I finally said, "Don't we kind of need to leave?" My mom replied, "He's only playing varsity, and he's starting!" I was SO excited for him! I think I was more nervous than he was and held my breath every time he got the ball, but he played SO good! I have never been more proud of anything in my life. After the game it took all that was in me not to run down there and give him a huge hug. He would have been so embarrassed...I should've done it! Haha. But I waited patiently and only ran down a few steps to give him a big, sweaty hug. He had a nice bruised and swollen nose for his efforts, but a sister couldn't have been happier. I love my brother not only for being an awesome basketball player, but for being an awesome person. I love the nights we get to drive somewhere and talk, laughing about the things only siblings appreciate. Hearing all the things my mom will never know and telling him some of my own stories.

I wish I was home to spend more time with him, but I find comfort in a favorite quote. "Like branches on a tree, we grow in different directions, yet our roots remain as one. Each of our lives will always be a special part of the other." Although my family is growing up and growing in different directions we'll always have each other. I love my brother and can't wait to spend the next couple months watching him playing a sport he loves. Thanks Tanner for always loving me!

Snow!!!

Today I am thankful for the beautiful snow. We are in Montana on a road trip right now and we got dumped on last night. I haven't seen a beautiful snow storm in a long time. Snow in Wyoming is anything but beautiful! I love this beautiful world that God has given us to live in. I love the snow piled high on the branches of the trees. I can't wait for Christmas! <3

Way Behind...

Well I got way behind when my Internet quit working for a few days so...here are a few things I have been thankful for in the past little while!

I am thankful to have amazing friends all over the place. I wish I could see the ones I don't get to see more often. I am thankful for change. Normally I'm not a big fan, but change has been really good for me as of late and I can't wait to see where this next change takes me. I am thankful to be surrounded by people who believe the same things I believe. I love being able to talk about the gospel and hear the amazing blessings other people have received.

Last, but not least, I am thankful for my calling. I have learned from my calling that my life is awesome. I have learned to love people to an extent that I didn't know was possible. I've learned to see people through the Lord's eyes and love them for who they are.
   

      "Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle." - Plato

I know it's easier said than done, but be extra kind to someone today. You never know what they are going through and a simple act of kindness might just get them through another day. SMILE :)

Day 3

Today I am grateful for laughter. It seems like no matter how bad my day is, a laugh turns it all around. It's amazing how great something so simple is for your well being. So I am posting two videos that make me laugh...enjoy :)

This one is so sad, but I can't help but laugh every time I watch it. The two at the end are my favorite!

I think this is absolutely adorable! I love the pure joy babies find in simple things. I wish I could be more like that and remember to enjoy the simple things.

Day 2...

My wonderful internet wasn't working last night so here I am in the morning again. My day two of being grateful was pretty simple. I am so thankful to live in such a beautiful place. Cache Valley is one of the most beautiful places in the world, in my opinion, but I have never seen a sunset as pretty as those here in Ogden. I look forward to coming home every night so I can drive down the hill and see the gorgeous sunset.

I am also thankful for a wonderful mother who taught me to love the game of volleyball. It has caused me the most frustration, but as brought me some of my greatest joys. Volleyball is something that has given me numerous opportunities, so many life long friends and taught me valuable lessons. Thank you mom for sharing your love with me and supporting me over the years!

Be Grateful - Day 1

I forgot to write last night what I was thankful for so I got up extra early today so I wouldn't forget. I had a lot to be thankful for yesterday. The first was some pushed the button on the elevator in the Health Sciences Building (which is the slowest elevator known to man) and left. It was the best thing ever though because I didn't have to wait for it, I just hoped right on and headed to glorious study hall :)

Next I got to see my dad, my little brother, my aunt, and all of her kids at my game. I have the best support system a girl could ask for. I love my family! My little brother lights up my day every day I see him. He's a little punk sometimes, but he sure does know how to make me laugh. I love his grown up attitude in his little body. I can't wait until I can see him more.

See Good Days

A few weeks ago a friend gave me a book that really touched me. The author teaches you how to have a good perspective on life and learn how to "see" good days, not just "have" good days. 

She shares the story of a mother who had a baby prematurely. This little girl had many complications, one being that her heart was working too hard. The doctors did a surgery that they thought might fix it, but it didn't work. The mother watched as her little girl struggled to live. At one point her baby's heart started beating very rapidly and the doctor ran in. He physically held her heart with his fingers to slow it down and help it function properly. She compared this to Christ and the way that he holds our hearts when they are broken or working too hard. I loved this! She said that Christ will hold our hearts until his love can fill the gaps and fill us with his joy again.

He loves us!

The last few weeks have been ones of trial, but also ones of immense blessings. I can see the Lord's hand in my life every day as I look for his tender mercies. Whether it's a song that comes on the radio, a text from a friend, or a simple smile from a stranger. I know the Lord knows ME. I know He is looking out for me and giving me simple reminders that he is there. I am so grateful to have the gospel in my life and to have awesome examples surrounding me no matter where I go. I AM SO BLESSED! 

This month I want to try and do a post every day of something I am thankful for...so we'll see how I do! Be thankful and never stop telling the people you love that you love them.

The night Andrew stole my heart...

So I love music, particularly any music that has a piano in it. I discovered Jack's Mannequin in high school and fell in love. I've learned a lot more about Andrew McMahon (the lead singer and pianist) lately and his amazing story. He writes the most amazing music and I was lucky enough to be able to see Jack's Mannequin in concert last night.

Definitely one of the best nights I have had in a long time! I LOVED it! Andrew stole my heart with his incredible piano skills and the enthusiasm he has for what he is doing. The wait for them to come on stage was honestly the longest 20 minutes of my life. I wanted to cry when they finally made their appearence. He is so talented I just can't get over it!

I got to enjoy the show with my best friend who will be leaving me soon for her mission to London! I'm so excited for her and can't wait for her to go on this adventure. She is going to be a great missionary. I probably should have waited to post because I get to go to another concert on Friday, but I just couldn't wait.

Andrew you stole my heart with your crazy hair, amazing piano skills, and love for life. Thank you for sharing your gifts with the world!

Dancing alone with the way it was...

I know I have written about this before, but the last few days I have been really missing Wyoming, the girls, and all of the wonderful people I met there. As I was listening to some music this morning a song came on that hit it right on nose. I'm still dancing alone with the way it was...I feel like everyone else is either still there or has moved on to enjoy what they are doing now, but I just can't seem to do that. I just miss life the way it was. I feel so alone in that. Thank you Parachute for making me feel like someone understands...

Procrastination at its finest

If there were a competition for world's best procrastinator I think I would definitely win! It is ridiculous how much time I spend procrastinating. Tonight I had an assignment due, I thought at midnight, but, oh no, it was due at 9. When did I start this 135 question assignment...8:30! Haha I got an awesome score of 12.5% on the assignment. Not going to lie, I'm pretty proud I got that far.

While I was procrastinating this assignment I got to talk to a friend I miss, call my best friend, and even got my homework done for another class two weeks early! I guess I'm not too horrible at procrastinating,. Honestly though, why in the world would I do homework for a test I have already taken and the stuff doesn't even make sense the way the questions are asked? Waste of time if you ask me! I think listening to music and singing along is a much more worthwhile way of spending my time! Don't you agree?

If anyone is feeling up to it...I'd love to have a procrastination competition! :)

Living Life

Lately life has seemed to have given me it's fair share of challenges and decisions to make. Most of them I don't really want to deal with and avoiding them has seemed to be the best option. I decided that isn't going to work anymore. As I was reading through another blog, they shared this quote:

"The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life.  Attitude, to me, is more important than facts.  It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people think or say or do.  It is more important than appearance, giftedness, or skill.  It will make or break an athletic team, company, organization, church, or a home.  The remarkable thing is that we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day.  We cannot change the regrets of the past nor do we need to fear the events of the future.  Regret and fear are twin thieves who would rob us of the thing we have control over, that is our attitude.  We need to learn to go into the arena every day with a winning attitude and enjoy the challenges it brings.  I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it.  And so it is with you...we are in charge of our attitudes."  -Charles Swindoll

I absolutely loved it! I have learned that no matter what decisions I might make, it is ultimately my attitude that is going to determine if that choice was a good one or not. I can't keep living my life with question marks at the end. I have to start putting some periods and even a few exclamation marks. I have to be happy with decisions I make, they are my decisions, and if I can't accept the consequences, I am throwing away my gift of agency. Attitude truly is everything! Love life and live with no regrets. 

School is hard...

So school is kind of hard. Who would've thought? I actually have to read my textbooks? Who does that? I guess I do now. I am so tired of highlighters and pages full of notes. Has it really only been 2 weeks?? I am going to go crazy!!

I thought once school started life would go faster, but the days just seem longer. I fall asleep reading my textbooks most nights and then school is right in my face again the next morning. I have already gotten 2 parking tickets...so dumb! I miss walking to school and being able to wake up 10 minutes before class, get dressed and run to class. None of that here...it takes 10 minutes just to walk across campus to my class. Not to mention the 20 minutes it takes to find a place to park. I hope I get used to this quick!

Finding Joy in the Journey

I was introducing myself to my new bishop this past Sunday and explaining some of the feelings that I had about being here at Weber. He told me something that really struck me. He said,

"Where you are today is a consequence of every decision you have made up to this point, good or bad."

I have never thought of life like that. I began thinking and realizing how true that is. If I never picked up a volleyball I wouldn't have met half of my very best friends, I wouldn't have had a chance to go to Wyoming, and I most certainly would not be where I am now. Just because of one simple decision to love playing volleyball, it has shaped my life.

I am struggling where I am right now, but I know there is a reason I am here. Until I find that reason, I will enjoy the journey. President Monson shared this advice,

"Let us relish life as we live it, find joy in the journey, and share our love with friends and family. One day each of us will run out of tomorrows." 

I know I spend a lot of time planning and dreaming of how my tomorrows will be. I am realizing how much I am missing by worrying so much about my tomorrows. I don't have time to enjoy today. This journey I am on right now is one I don't understand, but I do understand that it is my choice to enjoy it or not, to be grateful for the opportunities I have.

I am so blessed to have people that love me and care about my success. I have every reason in the world to be happy, so I will be. I can enjoy the journey.

The 19th Year

A lot has happened in the 19th year of my life. Thinking back to a year ago today I was in Wyoming with the group of girls who got me through a few of the hardest months of my life, but also the greatest months. They surprised me with some awesome presents and sang happy birthday. It was one of the last nights I saw my best friend Landon before he left on his mission. We went to the Toby Keith concert and ate at Iceberg after. It is pretty crazy to think that was an entire year ago.

Things  I learned...

   I love those girls in Wyoming more than they will ever know

How to work through making decisions     

How to deal with the consequences of procrastination...in a major way :)

     People are kind and communication is a huge problem solver in ANY situation

Things I did...

                    Graduated

                                             Made lots of new friends 

Met some people who have changed my life forever

Ran 5 miles without stopping                     Lost a million golf balls 

My first experience night swimming

            I had surgery...again! 

Remembered how much I love math

My life is not even close to where I thought it would be at this point. I don't exactly know what I had in mind, but this wasn't it. I'm starting this new chapter at Weber and I have already met some great people. I love these girls on my team and I am thankful for their kindness. Each year of life seems to pass by faster and faster. I have to enjoy every moment and love the little things :)

Days 2 & 3

Well days two and three of the two weeks of torture are complete! WAHOO!! Even though we had to be up much earlier Wednesday and lifted weights I actually thought it went a lot faster. The food was delicious as well and my headache was finally gone...thank heavens. Thursday was a little slower, but still pretty good.

I passed my conditioning test and didn't even throw up. I was pretty happy about that. I have a bunch of blisters on my feet, but they don't hurts so that is good. I am trying to be a lot more positive about this whole experience, because I'm still not really sure why I am here. Only 3 more practices and I get to come home for my birthday :) I feel like I have been here for a really long time so that is pretty exciting. I miss my family!

This whole no Facebook thing is really killing me. I don't know what to do with all this extra time on my hands. Maybe I should do something productive like read a book or put away my clothes. That would be a good place to start! Ryan and his sister Nicole stopped by to visit last night and it was so good to see them. It made me feel like I hadn't been gone too long.

I am starting to get the whole defense thing down, but still forget sometimes. I just have to keep working and doing everything I can to make this the best experience possible. I'm glad that I am where I am and I will take this as a learning experience...hopefully a positive one! :)

Really...

So I got all moved in to my room here at Weber and I HAVE NO FACEBOOK FOR 2 WHOLE FREAKING WEEKS!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I am going to die...I feel like everything is going to happen and I will not even know. Pathetic right? Yeah...well I am having serious withdrawals. It's good though because I called all of my friends I haven't talked to in a while and that was fun. Music is my new best friend and I am going to probably have a billion slideshows made once I am done with these two weeks of torture!

We had the first day of practice today and it was a little rough. I have a bruise on my pinky finger and have absolutely no idea how it got there. We have weights at 6:45 tomorrow morning and I am not looking forward to it. I miss Wyoming like crazy! I never thought I would say that, but it was so nice to be able to walk to practice and take a nap between sessions. I miss my roommates terribly, but love my new ones. I just wish I could skip the next two weeks and I think life would be great.

I can't wait for school to start! I decided that I am going to be a really good student this semester, I might even open my textbook! That's a scary thought, but nerd to the max here I come. I am excited for my classes and a chance to learn new things.

I miss home pretty bad right now, especially my friends. I am SOO glad I only live 45 minutes away! My wonderful friend Ryan told me I have to find something to be happy about every day so today that is the fact that I am drinking a Dr. Pepper and that I have friends that will let me cry to them Haha. Until probably tomorrow since I don't know what the crap to do with my life...live, laugh, love! Peace! :)

Road Trippin!!

So my friends and I decided to head up to the Bodies Exhibit in Idaho Falls for a little road trip. I never knew Idaho could be so exciting! We had so much fun and the exhibit was amazing. I forgot how much I loved human anatomy, our bodies are incredible. We had some really interesting experiences and saw some questionable people, but it was a great trip full of laughs. We even got some really great shots for our boy band album cover! Haha.

My birthday is coming up and my friends wanted to see if we could get free dessert at Olive Garden so they told our waiter it was my birthday. He said they didn't do anything for free...BUT he gave us a million mints! I was totally ok with that because the mints are the best part of Olive Garden. He was also awesome enough to melt a candle on to one of the mints and let me blow it out after they sang happy birthday to me. I would say that was a pretty awesome early birthday present.

My sweet friend Rachael was nice enough to drive up so I could see her and meet her precious little girl Peyton. I cannot believe that I am old enough to have friends that are married and have babies, I must be getting old! Her daughter is adorable and I am so glad I got to spend some time catching up with her.

When we got back from our trip we had an awesome birthday party for my friend Ryan and watched an incredible lightning storm. We even got to call 911 because saw a fire start on the mountain...so exciting! haha :) It was an exciting night and I even got an awesome early birthday present of some lightning pictures! Thank you Ryan!

I head off to Weber tomorrow...still unsure about all of this, but trying to have a good attitude. I can't wait to meet my team and make some new friends. Thank you everyone who made this summer great!

August...ALREADY?!

WHERE HAS SUMMER GONE?! I only have one more week at home and I am heading off to Weber State. This summer has been a blast, but has gone by so quickly again. I swear the older I get the faster time goes. I have worked a lot and it seems like that ran my summer. I went to the pool once, I didn't even get to go to Bear Lake, but I saw a few movies, including Harry Potter (so sad it's over) and had fun with some friends. Here are a few pictures from my summer!

Night swimming at Porcupine Dam

Minute to Win It with my family 

Hiking the Wind Caves

Church History and Art Museum

At the Capitol Building...family
made this summer a great one!

Summer has had it's fair share of ups and downs, but for the most part it was great! I learned a lot about myself and what I want from life. Up next, Weber....we will see how that goes!

*My Best Friend*

So I have this friend, and she is amazing. We have been inseparable since we were 10 years old. There wasn't a weekend I didn't spend with her playing volleyball, watching Pearl Harbor, or staying up all night laughing. The biggest fight we ever had was in 5th grade and it was over a fruit roll up. She has stuck with me through the good, the bad, and the ugly and somehow she still likes me and we still have things to talk about! So many memories of loving the same boys, the awful night at Lagoon, reading my journal and laughing at how ridiculous I am, singing in the car, me waking up on the floor and not knowing how I got there, and the hours of talking.

Our lives took us in different directions and we spent a year apart. I hated not having my best friend around, but thankfully life has brought us back together again. This last week we went night swimming and I stopped at her house to pick her up. I walked in and we were wearing the exact same outfit! Apparently after 10 years of being friends, you start dressing the same way without even talking about it.

This girl is one of the greatest blessings I have been given. I wouldn't be the person I was without her. She never gave up on me even when I deserved it. She has always been there for me, knows me better than I know myself sometimes, and I will always love her!

"A best friend is the person who knows the song in your heart and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words."

Thank you Syd for always listening, letting me cry, and reminding me what is really important. Also, most importantly, for hating all the boys that are jerks and reminding me I deserve better! I love you!

1932 Miles

My heart belongs to a boy that is 1932 miles away, but on my worst day, he still makes it all better. I don't know how he constantly knows just what I need to hear. I know the Lord's hand is in my life continually because these 1932 miles can't stop that wonderful boy from knowing I need him. 286 days down...and I love him more than ever!

444 days until I'm right here again :)

A Place In This World

This song says it all....I just want to scream this at the top of my lungs to everyone right now.

Happiness

So after I complained a little bit (ok a lot a bit) last time, I decided I need to be happy and enjoy this journey. Happiness is a decision and it is one that I need to make every day! Being sad is just not very fun and no one wants to be friends with someone who is sad and depressed every day. So here is some of what makes me happy:

The Justin Bieber movie never fails me!

• Costa Vida...I never get sick of it
• Music (especially Mumford & Sons, Tyler Ward, and Owl City)
• Reading
• Playing the piano
• Singing at the top of my lungs and not caring how horrible I sound
• The temple

Being stupid with my friends!

I love them all :)

How can you not love this boy? Haha

Missing Someone

I hate how life seems to constantly be changing. I love the new people that change brings into my life, but I miss all the people change takes away. Today I am missing all of those people. Moving away from home took away the friends I had here, moving back home took my friends from school, and a mission took away my best friend. I hate that there are so many people who mean so much to me that I don't get to see or talk to anymore...why does that happen?? I don't understand.

I'm tired of missing people. Especially Landon. It has been 8 months, but it feels like an eternity. I am forgetting what it felt like to be in his arms and have him love me. I forget what he smells like and the sound of his laugh. I forget what him telling me he loves me sounded like. I'm forgetting and it breaks my heart. Why do people have to be taken away? I appreciate Landon now more than I ever did when he was home, but I think 8 months is long enough for me to learn that lesson. My heart knows I love him more than anyone in this world, but my head is forgetting why. I hate this feeling. I know he is where he needs to be doing what he needs to, but sometimes I need him too.

Top 5 of June :)

I love music and finding new songs is one of the best feelings ever, especially when they sing about your life. Music always seems to make me feel better! Sometimes because it makes me realize someone else's life is a lot worse than mine, other times because it explains my situation perfectly, and some songs are just awesome! So my top 5 songs of June are:

1. The Heart of Life - John Mayer

2. Homeboy - Eric Church

3. Stay Young, Go Dancing - Death Cab for Cutie

4. Home - Ian Axel

5. Mine Again - Black Lab

Give them a listen :)

The Little Kid Inside...

So...I LOVE Winnie the Pooh. I just think he is the cutest thing ever and all his little friends are amazing, especially Piglet. He is the wisest little bear and he makes me happy on the days I can't find much to be happy about. Today I was reading some of his quotes and just wanted to share a few of my favorites...enjoy :)

"You can't stay in your corner of the forest, waiting for others to come to you; you have to go to them sometimes."

"Rivers know this: there is no hurry. We shall get there some day."

(Love life, it goes by so fast, and the someday I dream of is suddenly a reality and I wish I would've enjoyed all the time I wasted dreaming of my someday.)

"If the person you are talking to doesn't appear to be listening, be patient. It may simply be that he has a small piece of fluff in his ear."

"Don't underestimate the value of Doing Nothing, of just going along, listening to all the things you can't hear, and not bothering."

(I love this one, sometimes I get so caught up in life, I forget that it's ok to just do nothing and not care for a little while. Life doesn't need to be rushed and full every second.)

"If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one day, so I never have to live without you."

(Amen...living without him right now is enough of living without him. I've paid my dues!)

"Sometimes, if you stand on the bottom rail of a bridge and lean over to watch the river slipping slowly away beneath you, you will suddenly know everything there is to be known."

I love the simplicity he gives to life. I think we could all use a little more of that in our lives! Thank you Winnie the Pooh for putting a smile on my face and reminding me to enjoy the simple things in life.

Someday...

This is one of the cutest songs I have ever heard. Not only do they make the movies jealous, but they make me jealous as well. They are adorable. Someday it will be my turn to make the movies jealous...someday....

Graduated...again

The first time I graduated was bad enough, but lucky me, I got to do it again! Standing in line for an hour in those horrible gowns with the ugly caps, and the annoying tassel that gets in your mouth every time you move...I don't understand who thought this was a good idea. Give me my sheet of paper that says I actually went to school and let me leave!! UGH...you can see how much I loved it, but it was the end of an amazing part of my life. Graduating from Western Wyoming was the culmination of a lot of ups and downs, tears and smiles, and many life experiences.

I completely despised this place the first 9 months I was there. I couldn't find one thing that was good about it except my best friend Ryan, my roommate Connie, and my dear friend Rachael. Ryan was my saving grace. I know that my Heavenly Father had planned that perfectly because I never would have in a million years picked Ryan to be my best friend, but He knew we needed each other. He made me laugh and kept me sane while I was missing everyone at home. I am so proud of Ryan and his decision to be on a mission now in Guatemala. He made a big impact on my life and will forever be a wonderful friend.

Connie and I are polar opposites, but somehow got along perfectly. She is a little fashionista and found a way to spend hundreds of dollars on clothes in Rock Springs! Haha. I am still not sure how that happened, but she always made me laugh. Especially her raps! I'm thankful I met her and learned from her. Rachael is one of the strongest people I know. Her life has not been one of ease, but she came out on top. She is now married with a beautiful baby girl. I am thankful to have her in my life as an example of perseverance and continual happiness.

I never would have made it through that first year without my wonderful missionary Landon. Not a missionary at that point, but he loved me from 3 hours away and took care of me the best that he could. So many times he would just listen to me cry about my problems and send a hug through the phone. He made coming home the greatest. I was a princess in his eyes and that made the world ok. I miss him more than my heart knows how to handle most days, but we are getting there. 7 and 1/2 months down...almost 1/3 done and we still love each other. I don't know what will happen between us, but he will forever be the best friend I could ever ask for. Always there for me no matter what. I don't know what I would do without him. So...next 16 and 1/2 months, please hurry. I want him back! :)

The second year as those who follow have read previously, has been the complete opposite. I have loved it from the first day. I was blessed with a team of wonderful girls that each have a special place in my heart. This year has gone by faster than any year in my life. These girls taught me so many life lessons I wouldn't even know where to begin. I was blessed with 3 wonderful roommates that hugged me when I cried, laughed with me at my retardedness, and took care of me when I decided to pass out and hit my head! Good thing 2 of them are nurses :) I already miss our late night talks and adventures when we all can't sleep. I miss the sleep talking and walking, the alarms that never shut off, and the never ending pile of dishes. 

Love these girls and Matt forever :)

So long story short, as much as I hate graduation, I am so grateful for everything in between that got me into that ugly gown and horrible cap. All the things in between are what really matter.

My World....Upside Down

I can't believe that it has already been an entire month since my last post, but time flies. So much has happened I don't even know where to start. Whenever I make plans it seems like something comes along and completely ruins them. This has continually happened throughout my life and has happened again. I thought that my volleyball career was over, but apparently that isn't what someone else had in mind. About 2 weeks ago I got a phone call from Weber State asking me if I would come play for them. I had my heart set on Utah State, but told them if they would pay for me to be there I would come. I didn't hear from them for a week and a half and so I let the hope go that it would work out. Wednesday morning I got a phone call and much to my surprise, they offered to pay for everything. My mind just went nuts, I still don't think I have quite wrapped my mind around it yet, but I said yes.

Yesterday I signed my National Letter of Intent and signed my life away again. I'm still not quite sure what I am thinking by doing this, but I know that my paths are being directed. For whatever reason, Weber is where I need to be. So...I've got to find me a lot more purple to wear! I am really excited for this chance and grateful to all of the people who believe in me enough to give it to me. I can't wait to see what this new experience has in store for me!

The End of Something Great

Yesterday ended a chapter of my life that has been a significant part of making me who I am...I played my last game of volleyball at the collegiate level. Volleyball has been a part of my life since the day I was born, and something that I have loved for about the same amount of time. My world revolved around the sport and truly made me into the person I am. I love this game and as I have reflected on why it means so much, I thought of these 5 reasons:

1. It strengthened the relationship between me and my mom. Without volleyball I wouldn't have had the opportunity to spend as much time with my amazing mom. The many drives multiple times a week to practice and on the weekends to tournaments, long drives to National tournaments, and just the late nights talking about the game. I love my mom and have gained so much respect for her as a person because of volleyball.

2. I have made some of my very best friends because of volleyball. This game teaches you how to work with other people and allows you to develop relationships with them. Over the many years of playing I have met so many people who have touched my life. Some have stayed and continue to be part of my life, some I see occasionally, and others I don't see anymore, but each one is special and played a role in my life.

3. It tested my strength. Not only physically, but mentally. I am a much stronger person because of volleyball. I have had teams I didn't particularly like and others that I loved. The challenge that each team brought with it prepared me for many situations in life that I wouldn't have been able to learn otherwise. I am strong!

4. It taught me self-respect. Confidence is something that girls struggle with all over the world. Volleyball gave me something to have confidence about. I believed in myself and that in turn gave me confidence to do other things. I respect myself as a person because volleyball taught me that I am a good person and deserve to have respect.

5. It brought me some of the happiest moments in my life, but also taught me it's ok to lose every once in a while! :) Most of the time you learn more from losing. As I look back across my life, some of my happiest moments are on the volleyball court. Each team I have been a part of has taught me something new. Seeing all of the hours of hard work pay off in beating a team that you aren't supposed to beat is the greatest feeling in the world. My junior year of high school beating our rival Sky View was great, in club finally beating that team that it seemed like you could never beat, my first year of college beating Northwest who was ranked #17 in the country at the time, and this year beating the College of Southern Idaho, the defending National Champions, in 3 games and having to come from behind to win was so satisfying. The ultimate moment was in the 3rd place game at the Junior College National Tournament. We KILLED Salt Lake Community College in 3 games to finish as the 3rd best team in the country. As I looked around at all the girls on and off the court, knowing their sacrifices and hardships, the love we had for each other and the game, and knowing that we had just won was the greatest feeling volleyball has provided me.

Club 2008-2009

Senior Year

WWCC 2010

As I close this chapter in my life I think of the quote, "Don't be sad because it's over, smile because it happened." So today I smile because volleyball has given me some of my greatest blessings. This game will forever be a part of my life, but now it just won't be the center of it. Thank you to all of you who have been a part of this chapter of my life. I can't wait to see what this new one has in store for me! :)

Say...

I love today. I love talking with people I don't normally talk with, catching up with friends, but most of all being taught by people who don't even know they are teaching me. The spirit was so strong at church today and it was just what I needed, and it was all mostly thanks to people I have never talked to.

If you feel like you have something to say...say it. You never know who might need to hear it. No matter how hard it is for you to say. So today I am thankful for those people who said something. You blessed my life and you probably won't ever know it.

Today made me think of this song. "It's better to say too much, then never to say what you need to say."

Time flies when you're having fun...

Honestly I kind of hate all those dumb sayings, but I must agree with this one. Where the heck did March go?? Time is moving faster and faster I swear. March was a good month for me...took a few trips, spent time with family, and got closer to figuring my life out.

For Spring Break I went to Denver with my roommate on a recruit trip. We had a great time getting lost, ending up in the ghetto where I think we were the only white people, and just chatting along the way, but it wasn't the place for me. I came home and had a few fun filled days with friends and family. Started a prank war, talked the night away with my best friend, and got to spend a lot of time with lots of people I love!

After all that...I know blah, blah, get to the point...I decided to come to Utah State. Not sure exactly how that is all going to work out or who is going to pay for me to go to school, but it's the only place that felt right. So the decision is made and now my life better start falling in place...

This past week I spent with my family on their Spring Break! Lucky me...I got 2 Spring Breaks. I think this one definitely tops the first one though. My family is the best! We celebrated my little brother's 7th birthday along the way and soaked up some sun. We got to spend time at my favorite place, Las Vegas...don't ask why, but I just love it, the lights, the amazing hotels, and of course the Coke Factory...best Coke in the world in case you wanted to know! I also conquered a fear of heights and rode one of the rides on top of the Stratosphere...and I loved it! Haha.

March was a great month and if April keeps up the way it has this first week I will be one happy girl. In 4 days I will have gone 6 months without my missionary. Only 18 more! Crazy! I am so proud of him and everything he is doing. He has grown so much, but he's still the sweetheart I fell in love with. He will be back before I know it. Gotta love life, even when it decides to hates you, keep smiling! :)

Memories :)

I am being a loner in my apartment this weekend and got a little bored. I have been trying to learn how to use Picasa and so I made this little video. It is almost all of the pictures me and Landon took over the years, minus all the ones where we can't keep our eyes open, and there are quite a few of those! Haha. I miss that boy a lot, but this made me smile :) Also, one thing that made me happy today already is memories. Landon and I have quite a few of them, they get me through the hard days! :)

Updates...

I know I just barely posted because I was so caught up in that moment and my own thoughts I didn't even think of updating my life. I went on two trips one to Alabama and one to Alaska for volleyball. They were both beautiful and a lot of fun. I haven't made any decisions as of yet, but I am going to Denver in a week and a half for my last visit. I am crossing my fingers that Denver is the place for me! I don't want to be so far from home. Here are some pictures from the trips!

Shuttle in Alabama

Space Camp Dorms

Polar Bear Ice Sculpture

Amazing Rainbow

Musk Ox...they're actually really little

SO many trees!

And Landon of course...I miss that boy!! He always knows what to say to me and he just keeps getting more amazing every week. He has been gone 142 days today...a little more than 20 weeks...almost 5 months! :) So many countdowns! Haha I am so proud of him and everything he is doing. He never ceases to amaze me and I seem to be falling more in love with him the longer he is gone. He makes me a better person from a country away. Anyway...you could have all done without hearing that, but I don't have anyone to tell anymore! I can't wait until he is back here with me :)

Hopefully in the next few weeks I'll be able to write my final decision for school in the fall! Until then, remember to live, laugh and love! :) Life is too short not to!